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It wasn’t long before we were discussing where we wanted to live when we moved in together, how we would integrate our families, and what our wedding would be like.

At that point, after more than our share of failed relationships, we both genuinely thought we had found “the one.”◊♦◊The day I was granted equal custody of my daughter fell smack-dab right in the middle of our relationship, and looking back, it was a defining moment for us—the day I can pinpoint as the beginning of the end.

It’s meant a natural long distance relationship has evolved that now often includes them reading their books to him, sharing magic tricks, and fun facts, and creating things they can show him on video.

He’s sent Easter treats, and we talk and work together to give cooperative family gifts for birthdays and Christmas.

You can live your life, go out on dates, and pretty much do whatever you want within the confines of the law for 26 days out of the month.

Easy or not, the majority of those four years, I was battling some fairly serious depression and anxiety due primarily to the minimal time I was able to spend with my daughter and the ongoing conflict with her mother.

We started dating casually, but we fell for each other hard and fast.These dads may be more physically present in their kids’ lives, but are they a better father than my children’s?How do we measure what a “good father” is after separation?They have asked why he doesn’t live in the same country as them.The youngest feels it the most keenly, as her memories are of a Skype dad.I never would have planned out a long distance father for my children. I see no purpose in trying to make him be something he is not, nor filling my children’s head with stories for how he “should” be. And he certainly isn’t a “deadbeat.” Read more on Families.